Gone in a "Flash'

Mmmmmm K! I am now officially 2 weeks (+ 1 day) post-op from my Prophylactic Bilateral Mastectomy (PBM)

First, I just want to say, thank you all SO much for the outpouring of support, gifts, flowers, phone calls, concern, and well wishes! it really has meant so much more to me than I could ever express in words!

So, Sappy stuff out of the way.. moving right along!

MY BOOBS ARE GONE! Ha!

I knew that would happen, but it was all a little (understatement of the year) surreal. That's the best word I can think of to describe what its like.. when I have an itch I can't scratch on my numb (dead feeling) flat/concave chest.. it's weird, relieving, annoying, erie and quite frankly completely overwhelming.
When my daughter stands in front of me and rests her head on my boney chest it literally takes my breath away.. It doesn't hurt though. It's just.. well, weird.

There's some hypersensitivity in the area surrounding my wounds. My right arm is regaining feeling as the nerves repair themselves after the sentinel node biopsy (which came back negative btw). Steri strips are still on, but my drains are out HALLELUJAH! (Why are there 2 spellings for Halleluiah?)
Drains came out 4 days after surgery which is INCREDIBLE actually and probably the best day of my husband's life! He was solely responsible for stripping, cleaning, emptying the drains every 4 hours, and while he did an amazing job, we were both over it! It was a pain in the..."back" for him and left me feeling helpless that I had to have THAT much assistance with things. I just wasn't used to it. Drains didn't hurt, but getting them out will be an entirely new post >insert barf emoji here<

I am actually doing 4000% better physically than I thought I would be! Mentally I will catch up! Don't worry, the "old me' will be back before you know it!

Now I'm gonna flash you....

Brought to you by no make up, bed head and the love and support of this sweet girl right here! This was 3 days post op.. I couldn't believe how much pain I wasn't in! #Winning

Buh Bye Boobies!

It is through a roller coaster of emotions that I ride to the hospital this morning. Saying goodbye to all my bras that have served me well over the last 33 years (figuratively, obviously they’re not the same ones.. GROSS!)
The decision to finally have my Pofalactic Billateral Mastectomy without Reconstruction was not an easy one to make. It included many years of therapy, 6 1/2 years living with the knowledge of my BRCA-1+ diagnosis, and a lot of opinions and input from everyone in my life and others who have fought the fight either against breast cancer, or to avoid the very high risk that us BRCAteers have.
While I might put on a happy face and prance around like a brave warrior woman (pretty sure brave warrior women don’t prance) inside I’m crying. Hell, even outside I’m crying sometimes, just preferably not in public..

So, in a few hours I’m gonna be FLAT! Which would be a first for me since 3rd grade! I hope I come out of seurgery (not puking) feeling relieved and empowered to continue on without the looming fear that “this could be the day I have breast cancer”. Or crack another joke like “yea, if I live that long”..

I intended on taking all these amazingly whimsical “before photos” at the beach and when I got there I felt everything except whimsical.. It could’ve been the 20 somethings with their cheekies in the sand taking pics for their insta-fame and 4 billion followers, but it was a feeling. A feeling that maybe I wouldn’t want to look back at myself looking whimisical on the beach WITH boobs. No, I think I’d rather look forward to looking strong and brave on the beach without boobs!

So with that being said, it’s only gonna get harder before it gets any easier, however, once I’m in it I have no notice but to navigate through it. So dang it, that’s what I’m gonna do! Which me luck!

At Home Test?!

Whaaaaaat?!? How cool is THIS?! Now it's easier than ever to get tested for the BRCA-1 and BRCA-2 genetic mutation

https://www.color.com/l/welcome?utm_source=Facebook&utm_campaign=Prospecting_oCPM&utm_medium=W&utm_content=lori

Pink & Red

Happy Valentine's Day! Do you have any traditions to celebrate? Please share!

We do our best to stay healthy even though this is a holiday surrounding candy, chocolate, and everything sweet!

We do flowers, balloons, pink (breast cancer awareness) and red (heart disease awareness), we do movies, hugs and kisses, snuggles, heart shaped everything, yummy dinners, and we are present over perfect,

We miss our loved ones who've passed, and we make new memories as a family together to cherish always.

Squeeze each other tight tonight because yesterday is gone and tomorrow isn't promised.

Much Love...

Groundhog Day 2017

6 more weeks of winter! Thanks Punxsutawney Phil! ;-)

International Women's Day

HAPPY INTERNATIONAL WOMEN'S DAY FROM "NOVARIAN CANCER"!! This is my favorite woman EVER!!! She was such an advocate for BRCA testing and saved lives while fighting for her own! So many women around the world are avoiding ovarian cancer altogether because of women like her.. Today I saw something that said "Here's to strong women! May we know them. May we be them. May we raise them." I think that saying hits the nail on the head!!!
My mom was the strongest woman EVER!! I like to think she passed that strength on to me and I will pass it to my daughter.

Celebrate one another  by building each other up instead of tearing eachother down!

A step in the right direction...

This article briefly describes a new drug that has been found to be effective in the fight against Ovarian Cancer..

It's so sad how many people have succumbed to this terrible disease before they will ever find a cure. I know there's a lot of politics that go in to major medical and pharmaceuticals, but the bottom line is, they are working hard to find a cure, I hope they're close.